The design:

Do you suffer from par-ent-ing? Headaches, chronic fatigue, and Moana on repeat? You may need AphukenbrakE.

The details:

• 100% combed ring-spun cotton
• Soft, relaxed fit
• Rob is 5’7”, 175 lbs, and wearing a size L. He hosts Paternity Leave with Rob King, and does a spot-on Will Smith impression.

S : 28" (length from shoulder) 19" (chest)
M: 29" (length from shoulder) 20.5" (chest)
L: 30" (length from shoulder) 22" (chest)
XL: 31" (length from shoulder) 24" (chest)
2XL: 32" (length from shoulder) 26" (chest)

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

A logo? Nah. It's a badge of honor. Being a dad never looked so good.

The details:

• 16 oz
• Dishwasher safe

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

Do you even lift, bro? Um, yeah. Between chucking the kids in the air, lugging the garbage out, doing nightly 12 oz curls, and sitting up every time someone calls my name, I’m never NOT working out. Bro.

The details:

• 100% cotton jersey
• Soft, relaxed fit
• Matt is 6’1”, 197 lbs, and wearing a size L. He won his middle school talent show, hula hooping to Hanson’s MMMBop. (Pics or it didn’t happen.)

S : 28" (length from shoulder) 18" (chest)
M: 29" (length from shoulder) 20" (chest) 
L: 31" (length from shoulder) 22" (chest) 
XL: 32" (length from shoulder) 24" (chest)
2XL: 33" (length from shoulder) 26" (chest)

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal 

The design:

A logo? Nah. It's a badge of honor. Being a dad never looked so good.

The details:

• 3.5" tall x 3.5" diameter
• 100% Foam
• Made in USA

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

It was a simpler time. Plumbers were heroes. Dragons were villains. Ducks were hunted. Tecmos were bowled. Our bits weren’t even in double digits yet! Moral of the story? Sometimes less is more.

The details:

• Tri-blend: 50% poly, 25% cotton, 25% rayon
• Super soft, comfy fit
• Runs slightly small, size up for a more relaxed fit

• Nick is 6’0”, 195 lbs, and wearing a size L. His dad’s favorite bedtime song was “If you’re happy and you know it...keep it to yourself and let me sleep.”

S : 27.5" (length from shoulder) 18.25" (chest)
M: 28.5" (length from shoulder) 19.75" (chest)
L: 29.5" (length from shoulder) 21.25" (chest)
XL: 30.5" (length from shoulder) 22.75" (chest)
2XL: 31.5" (length from shoulder) 24.75" (chest)

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

A logo? Nah. It's a badge of honor. Being a dad never looked so good.

The details:

• 52% cotton, 48% poly fleece 
• Super soft fleece, with side pockets and drawstring waistband.
• Matt is 6’1”, 197 lbs, and wearing a size L. He won his middle school talent show, hula hooping to Hanson’s MMMBop. (Pics or it didn’t happen.)

S : 30" (waist, relaxed) 28" (inseam)
M: 34" (waist, relaxed) 28.25" (inseam)
L: 37" (waist, relaxed) 28.75" (inseam)
XL: 40" (waist, relaxed) 28.75" (chest)
2XL: 43" (waist, relaxed) 28.75" (chest)

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

My dad is stronger, faster, cooler, and can throw things way farther than yours. He's #1. It's just a scientific fact.

The details:

• 52% cotton, 48% poly fleece 
• Super soft fleece, with side pockets and drawstring waistband.
• The #1 Dad is 5’11”, 180 lbs, and wearing a size M. He’s proficient in magic and turkey calling, and can bass fish like nobody’s business.

S : 30" (waist, relaxed) 28" (inseam) 
M: 34" (waist, relaxed) 28.25" (inseam)  
L: 37" (waist, relaxed) 28.75" (inseam)  
XL: 40" (waist, relaxed) 28.75" (inseam) 
2XL: 43" (waist, relaxed) 28.75" (inseam)

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

Say it fast. Faster. Faster. Heh. Gets 'em every time. Eye yam sofa king funny. (And so f*cking dad.)

The details:

• 80% cotton, 20% poly
• Midweight soft fleece
• Roomy fit, size down for a standard fit
• Dave is 6’0”, 205 lbs, and wearing a size M. He once jumped off a dock even though he can't swim. He was pier pressured.

S : 27.5" (length from shoulder) 18.25" (chest)
M: 28.5" (length from shoulder) 19.75" (chest)
L: 29.5" (length from shoulder) 21.25" (chest)
XL: 30.5" (length from shoulder) 22.75" (chest)
2XL: 31.5" (length from shoulder) 24.75" (chest)
3XL: 32.5" (length from shoulder) 26.75" (chest)

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

It feels like maybe my number should be higher, tbh. I’m not sure if I’m pleasantly surprised, or feel like I need to pick up the pace a bit.

The details:

• Tri-blend: 50% poly, 25% cotton, 25% rayon
• Super soft, comfy fit
• Runs slightly small, size up for a more relaxed fit
• Matt is 6’1”, 197 lbs, and wearing a size L. He won his middle school talent show, hula hooping to Hanson’s MMMBop. (Pics or it didn’t happen.)

S : 27.5" (length from shoulder) 18.25" (chest)
M: 28.5" (length from shoulder) 19.75" (chest)
L: 29.5" (length from shoulder) 21.25" (chest)
XL: 30.5" (length from shoulder) 22.75" (chest)
2XL: 31.5" (length from shoulder) 24.75" (chest)

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal

The design:

All at the same time! (Hopefully, without spillin'.)

The details:

• 80% cotton, 20% poly
• Midweight soft fleece
• Roomy fit, size down for a standard fit
• Dave is 6’0”, 205 lbs, and wearing a size M. He once jumped off a dock even though he can't swim. He was pier pressured.

S : 26.5" (length from shoulder) 20.5" (chest)
M: 28" (length from shoulder) 22" (chest)
L: 29.5" (length from shoulder) 23.5" (chest)
XL: 31" (length from shoulder) 25" (chest)
2XL: 32.5" (length from shoulder) 26.5" (chest)
3XL: 34" (length from shoulder) 28" (chest)

The delight:

• FREE RETURNS
• FREE high fives from other dudes who know the deal