Lava? Please. I'll take lava any day instead of these these motherf*ckers.
If you're gonna watch Moana 497615397264352379652 times, you might as well look the part. Aloha, bruh. 🤙
I'm not like a regular dad. I'm a cool dad...with even cooler beverages.
Let's be honest. There's no instruction manual or anything for this dadding thing. (Right? You didn't get one, did you??) We're all just doing the best we can and hoping not to screw 'em up too badly.
Hopefully your kids don't scream "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" and hurl themselves down an endless shaft when you make this statement...but, you never know.